So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
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