she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Is that strawberry winking at me??
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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