i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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