Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
