its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize
