i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
