she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Someone signed my nipple.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
