And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
