party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
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