Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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