my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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