New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Randomize
