Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
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