Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
Randomize
