The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize
