It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Randomize
