from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
try to milk me bitch
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