i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Randomize
