So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Randomize
