her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
