They should really pass out barf bags in church
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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