Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
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