i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
