awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
