Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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