I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
We are two peas in an std pod
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize