just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
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