you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
40s are totally the cure
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
Randomize