I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
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