Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
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