**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Randomize
