They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
