i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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