toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
