I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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