my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Randomize
