Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
This show inspires me to have sex in space
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
