oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
