While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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