You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
