so that wasnt chicken after all
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
your like the ambassador to my penis.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
