why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
