As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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