carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
