His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize
