I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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