i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
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