I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize
