entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
