i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize
