I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
The power of my boobs compel you
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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